I don't think i'll update my blog often because i'm busy due to the AYG (Asian Youth Game). I'll be back home late in the evening and i need some good rest for the next day. Definitely, i'll miss school :( I can't wait for tomorrow!

eventhough i've know the truths, i was taught to be more patience to accept the facts. i am trying so hard to make myself feel better but unfortunately, nothing work on me. i feel sooooooo pathetic :(

at least he knows how to take care of my heart :] i'm proud of myself but never felt happy for him because still, he gets to see that G.

Labels: will not update until AYG ends.

I've got nothing to blog about because basically, what the school did today is, temperature taking, H1N1 slideshows, Michael Jackson's death. I got my AYG t-shirt and what can i say is, it wasn't that nice as i thought it is. And the colour, ain't up to my satisfactions. I hate that kind of light blue because to ME, it look so ugly. But however, i still have to appreciate it and wear it though :]

I'll not be at school for at least three days or more due to this AYG thingy. I have to be at school by six thirty and back home at six pm. Tell me how tiring can i be? Its an one whole day event okay! :] I have to be strong. Tomorrow, lessons are to be conducted as normal and i'm not mentally prepared for study! I'm still in the holiday mood. I don't feel like i'm at school because it just feel the same. Can i go to AYG thing tomorrow? Hah, kanciong! Hehhhh, not kanciong lah, just can't wait for the day :]

Oh, i went to dance practice just now and there were no practice and i have fun looking at the others breaking. I look at them at one kind because they are all real goodddd! And today, its raining! Yaaaaaaay. And it's very cold. And i pity my hawa BJ because she wear shorts at the wrong timing. And she did not bring jacket along. Hehehe. I finally get to meet the juniors! I really miss them but the way we treat each other is not the same like before. Why eh? But still, they're funny + cute!

i wanted to look at you and even smiled at you. the matter is, i'm too ashamed to face you. you did not know what i felt all this while because, you are not in my shoe. i can't do anything. i'm useless now. i'll try my very best tomorrow or maybe whenever i feel like i want.

Despite the fact that i have to attend school for AYG thingy, i really enjoyed today because i get to meet my bestfriends and exchanged hugs! (From suhailah) Ain't NO lesbience ay. Today's AYG was a little bit boring because we had rehearsals and I, under ticketing have to seat with 3 other girls (Nurul,Aida&Juriah) for so long outside. I, could not stand the air-con that coming out from inside. I was freezing cold. And the food for lunch was awesome.

Reached school at about 12pm and headed off to home. Half-way, we went to pasar tengah to get ice-creams! I get myself Chocolate mint & it cost me $1.20 ? It has been ages since i last had that. Went to pasar malam nearby my house & saw a lot of Elmo things. I thought of getting myself one but its a waste of money. I got myself a phone casing & it cost 6bucks & its RED.

Stay over at my house for quite long and we played Uno. Together with my sister and i won 6 times and nurul won 1. Hehhhh. I know how to beat her already but still, don't know how to beat the others. (hehehehehe.) Then, we try new games like stress but Uno edittion. And we wanted to play Cheat/bluff but we only had two person so we'll know who's the cheater right? ;D

Another few more hours to school. I'm not ready yet. I've not signed my report book and so the travel form eventhough my classmates had remind me through msn. I'm sturborn, right? Hehhhh. I don't know how SHOULD i wake up early tomorrow? Just now, i woke up at 7 am cause the night before i slept at 3am. Geez. I think that's all for now & i miss so many people (:

I thought you're the one that i could trust but on the other hand, someone whom i detest a lot is the one who i supposed to trust. And he deserved it and not you.

I hate liars & i am a liar. (sounds so wrong)
I don't think i want to continue on living with a liar.
I'm scared if i might get cheated one day.
Liar will always a liar & a liar will always find a way to cover themselves up
once after someone who is not liar found out the truth.
Get what i mean? If you still don't understand, its okay.
Don't try so hard to understand what i've typed.
I wished you are dead now. I really hate dislike you.

I've got no time to entertain this.
All i could do for now is, to think about my future ahead.
No... My future plans that i've got in my mind.
I am an idiot.
I am stupid.
-.-

ewwwww.
i've never thought about it either. i do have the feelings that it would happened but never thought it could be as worst as this. i'm still strong to faced this. i have to. screw you, go and die. if you insist, go and get a better life!

Labels: i don't know but this is seriously RANDOM

I really enjoyed myself in the library with my loved ones eventhough we only spend around 3-4 hours in the library. After that, we went to Science center to walked around & had ice-creams at Macdonalds. Then, we had a talk. So much topics to talk about and after that we headed to the busstop and waited for bus. First, wanted to take 335 but ended up 198. We had so much laughter when we are in the bus and i almost fell when the time i wanted to go down the stairs because i was laughing really hard and didn't notice the steps. After that, met ella for a while and home sweet home. Anyway, i'm sorry for leaving you guys at the side without even talking to you. My bad :(

I can't wait for tomorrow's practice. I am ready to sweat and my rashes! I have to bring those importants things & i must be more concentrate tomorrow. I hope nothing cock up and so for my rashes! Hopefully, it won't came out at the wrong timing. If possible, don't even made it came out. I'd suffer a lot later.

To be frank, i thought you were lying but i've learnt to think positive and i look at the brighter side without thinking the negatives thoughts that lingers on my mind.

Hello. I feel like updating but i've got no idea what to blog about. Geez. Oh, holidays like another 4 pathetic days for us to finish it up & enjoy to the fullest before we get stress later. I want to go to school but i'm not ready to wake up very early in the morning & ended up sleeping in the class. (no, i don't sleep during lessons) And i don't think i'll end up sleeping in the class because there's Suhailah beside me. Hoping that she'd entertain me whenever i feel like sleeping. -.- I slept at 3.30 am last night and woke up 9.45am and i'm still sleepy. I wanna get some good sleeps but i know i will end up wake up in the afternoon. I have to go to library later, to freshen up my brains.

You know, i feel like there's some fishy that would be happened to me later. Why? Grrr..I'm scared. Like seriously. I don't know why is the hell i'm feeling this way. I feel like i'm being trapped with someone. No, never again. If it happened, grrr...I won't believe humans being. Haha. After saying all this, i feel so stupid. Like an idiot. Or am i just one of them? NO.

when it comes to problems like this, to be frank, i'm not good at settling this on my own. i don't know how to calm someone down. even if i know, i don't think it will work on you. i'm sorry, i'm scared that my ways made you feel uncomfortable. that's what i think.

Holidays is like another few days more before school re-open.Luckily there's no homework for me except for my tuition homework.I have to be prepare for school & i should focus more on my weak subjects.This time,i'm for real.I'm not anymore a yayapapaya type.Cause i've made the biggest mistakes in my life for not studying and try my best eventhough i've tried.I have to work even harder and prove to my mum this time that nothing is impossible.I am dissapointed with my results & it seems that its not my results.It was badly done.Gr,at times i agree with what my mum said,i'm such a playful girl which i've been denying that i'm not.I totally agree with what she had said.But even if she say that,she still loves me.She guide me from behind.I love my mum.

Why is there so many people wanted to extend their holidays?There's nothing you can do at home.I am restless when i'm at home.I feel like going out.I can't stay at home.If you extended the june holidays,the september holidays will be cut down.Er,that's what i heard.But luckily,school resumed on 29th june still. :)

I hope this 27th of june outing to sentosa is still on.I have no idea what to cook on that day itself.Should i cook fried rice or fried noodles?We'll decide later.Please,make yourself free on 27th june because i really want to hit the beach.It has been so long i went to beach.Feeling sun-tanned uh.But i don't think i'll get darker,yknow why?I cannot stay under a sun for so long because i'll end up having rashes all over my body.Gr,irritating! :D

I am concentrating watching,Terlanjur Cinta.Got to go,will update if i've got the time to update.Anyway,i am dissapointed with someone.Really dissapointed.I don't know what i should do now.

If things wanted to happened this way,then let it be,i'll go with the flow.Everything is in mess now.I hate to be in this situation and have to face the shits over and over again.I had enough.What will happened to be sooner or later,let it be.I'll endure with it :)

Sorry for the late updates.

I wanted to update on what happened to me to the last few days but sadly, I could not remember anything at all. But so far, I enjoyed myself every seconds of it and nothing dissapoint me. Things are getting better day by day. I've got no problems with either my family or friends. I have been relaxing my mind & myself at home. I'm looking forward for school because I can meet my friends. But, I don't know why I feel this. I am not looking forward to look at someone's face, definitely. No, I don't hate but I dislike and I don't know why I dislike that someone. But still, *ehem*

I am tired and I really need some good sleep and rest :)

I don't seems to understand why I'm not happy when there's no you?
Life should move on and you people would have thought I'm not strong.
Yes, I'm not strong enough to accept the fact that you are not there for me anymore.
But that was fine because I take that easy because I know you're busy.

I might not be the one. Even if I try even harder, I still won't be the one.
Because you've never told me what type of girl you want in your life.
You should have proud because I am being myself instead of being the girl that you want.
Do you know that everywhere I go, I heard your names being called out but I'm wondering,
why I didn't see you when I turned around?
I know you have never expect this whenever you know the truth.
But this is life.

I bet you yourself could not hide your own feelings from someone.
And I could roughly guess that one day, you might tell that someone you love her.
But, I know it could not be me.
It must be some other lucky girls out there.
Yes, nothing is impossible.
But I might not know what you've been up to.

I love you & you love someone else.
It's wasting my time.
I don't expect more from you but please have some thoughts.
I have been thinking about what others might said.
But you, stopping me from thinking what people would say.
People's mouth will never closed.
Either they talk, bitch, gossip, critic.

I should say that Life is never easy for me now.
Without you, my life is completely different.
I'm not kidding, its true.
No one made me happy.
No one cheer me up.
No one made me laugh.
No one jokes around with me.
No one fight with me over a thing.
No one would talk with me about stupid things.
No one complains to me.

Please come back and filled up my empty spaces.
I miss you, seriously.

To be frank, my happiness are with you.
But to have hopes on someone who is not willing, there's no point.
I better do my own things and move ahead.

Basically, I am surfing the net & at the same time, I'm doing my homework that my tutor gave me. I am still stuck at a few questions and luckily there's this book for reference. I almost gave up but luckily, I did not. For the first time I didn't give up in Mathematics :)

I am watching Jihan but I did not really concentrate so much because I was so busy with chatting. Oh, before that was Anugerah. I really really proud that every single one of them did their very BEST and I love Sein Ahmad. He is way better than previous although he did not know how to dance. Besides him, everyone are good too but the comments are quite hurtful too. Not by the judge but the singaporeans who did not revealed their real names. Comment punya lah macam sial, korang gi uh try nyanyi, ade brani? Tkde kan? Diam sudah lah, just watch :)

Now, I feel so sleepy and I've got like another 045968594302 more questions to be completed. I've got no more energy. I feel like going to sleep NOW but that is so impossible. I must complete by tonight so that tomorrow, I'll have some good sleep before tuition starts :)

Anyway, you know the Nikon DSLR D5000? Yeah, the one that shows on the advertisement? My sister said, she'll get it for me if ONLY I got back from by 7.30pm! Wah, I have to consider about it first but before that, I must ensure with her whether she's kidding or she's serious. Haha. If she is serious, I am willing to do it :) Sanggup pe. Birthday I is like another 4 more months to go.

I have just changed my blogskins & I'm loving it. Anyway, I have just deleted away my friendster and other website that I've signed up. So, don't bother to ask me about my friendster anymore.

I've got nothing to blog about, like seriously. Nothing in my head right now.

Uhhhhh, I went to dance practice just now and I love every single second of it. I really had fun but Crik have to leave early for work so left with the rest. And we went off around 7plus because I have to be home by 8pm. So, we walked from Taman Jurong all the way to Jurong. After that, I went to get myself cheese fries because I don't know why I feel like eating it padahal I'm craving for pizza :) My sister have yet to treat me pizza :(

What else?

School is like another 13 more days. I have not yet signed my report book and packed my books. Basically, I'm not mentally prepared for school. I'm not ready to wake up early. I'm not ready to seat & wait at the busstop for 5 or even more minutes for bus. I am not ready for school re-open morning messages. I'm not reader for naggings. I'm not ready to study. To be frank, I'm not ready to meet teachers & I'm not ready to open books and mug as hard as I can at school. Can someone extend the holidays much longer? Like, another 4 more weeks before school re-open? I don't feel like going to school uh.

Oh, I am so in love with Nike SB & Reebok Monopoly. I want to have it badly! :( I don't love my Nike Airmax anymore because it means nothing to me. Haha, bustard. Ya lah, when I'm out, so many matreps wore it. I don't like, macam irritating. But it's okay. They have their taste too pe.

I miss my handphone (stupid battery,bodoh gi rosak!), I miss my psp (nie lagi satu,rosak jugak), I miss my computer (could not connect to the internet,bodoh), I miss my friends (bila nk meet?), I miss everyone, I miss everything that I'm left with in the whole wide world.

Feeling -_-

I online but I chat with no one. I don't feel like chatting. Uhhh, soon, I'll NOT be using my msn anymore. I feel like the whole thing is getting boring. Next, blog. Can I like delete everything in cyber world? And you people contact me through mobile? Uhhhhh, I feel like deleting everything. Yes, everything. So...I'm left nothing.

I am not happy. I am not okay. I am just fine.
(omg,what's wrong with me cause I find myself so f**king weird lah!)

Oh, I forget to tell you that Friday, I'm out with my sister since she wants to go to Bugis to get herself things. Uhhhhh, I want her to pay for everything! GSS pe. Alah, if she loves me, she will willing to pay what. Hahaha! And then, she text me, feeling nk makan Breeks. Wah, I said, feeling nak makan pizza uh.

Wanna see me emoticonal? No.

I have been thinking about you seven night, seven days. I know you won't believed what I've just said because if I would let the whole world knows, they would prolly knows that I'm lying. I'm a BIG LIAR. No, I'm not. I'm honest, integrity but I do lie. But not everyday. Once a week uh :)

Eh, its like 1.20am in the morning. I better go sleep okay. Bye, goodnight.

I've got no interesting stories to shared. I am bored so I decided to blog.

I hope money will come down from the sky. If it really happens, drop me thousands or more because I really need that money to spend on my daily expenses. I don't want to work because I don't think working & study can balance. Somemore, I'm involved with activities outside. I don't have time for work and I'm not ready for work yet. I am wondering, why is it so hard for us to get money? You want it, you earn it. Grrr. Saving is fun but the things around me are tempting. And I can't avoid it. It's too tempting that I simply can't resist.

I'm stress.
Because I've been trying so hard to think what to blog about.

Ah, there's tuition tomorrow and after tuition, I had to rush for dance and after dance, I had to rush at home and sleep and get ready for the next day which is Tuesday. Shidah decided that we should meet up because it has been so long we didn't meet each other and the rest. And since Anisah & Aida need to get shirts for their camp purpose, so yeah. I can't wait for Tuesday. I am looking forward and hoping that nothing shits/fishy would happened aye. Peace.

I think that's all for today because seriously, aku dah tkleh pikir ape nk ckp lagi.

Labels: peace.

Anyway, i'm happy to say that my friends are back from OBS camps. Only god knows how much i miss them. I get to meet some of them except for some of them who did not attend today's AYG training due to some reasons that they had. I can see that some of them are getting darker due to the hot wheather and i pity them so much. Some of them said the camp was fine, okayokay and bored. So, i assume that the camps was just fine. I listened to what they talk about camps and different stories were shared. And there's this violent incident happened which makes me feel...ewwww. Nevermind about it. Don't wish to elaborate it either. Anyway, i'm lucky that i didn't attend to this OBS thingy because if i were to be there, i don't know what would happened to me. I am problematic girl. I can't stand hot & cold wheather. I'm weird :[

Today's AYG training was okay. They just show us where we should assemble and what we should do. Different people were assigned different task but everyone are ushers (spelling?) I am under the ticketing and i doubt that it will be going to be so much fun because my bestfriends are together with me. People like Anisah, Farhana, Shidah, Aida and Juriah but unfortunately, Suhailah is not the same group as us. Pity you. But whatever still, we could meet each other. No one should feel leftout. If you feel like you are, just tell us okay dear. We'll do something about it. The actually day would be on July. So just now was just the rehearsal. How i wish i could take part in Bowling? Haiyah.

Training ends at 12 plus. I decided to went home first to get some rest before i went to meet my mummy & daddy. I've set the time, by 5pm i meet them but in the end, we changed the time again because Farhana had to go Jurong Point to get this cleaning face thingy for her mum. So, i accompanied her. Around 5plus, we met Crik at 475 and waited for Hawa. They talk about OBS things and stuff. And we went off to grabbed something to eat. Since 483 is occupied, we went to Crik's to play monopoly and we really had fun. I laughed my ass off. Seriously. I really had fun. I almost got myself bankrupt but luckily, i didn't. Just my luck :] Went home at 9plus and i am so tired. I don't know why is the hell i feel so tired. Had a long bath and now here i am, updating my blog.

Because i know, anything could happened. So, before i face the consequence, i better think of other solution to get rid of it. I wouldn't want to get hurt, ever again. Because, i've promised myself never to shed tears again. I'm tired.

I miss Fiza, Kiki, Wany & Bella :] and i have yet to meet Shidah because she didn't turned up to AYG training today.

Anyway, happy 15th belated birthday Siti Suhailah Bte Halil. (sorry, takde gambar.)Wish you all the best in life and in your future ahead. I'm happy to see you happy but whenever you're down, don't worry, i'll be there with you no matter how hard the situation i'm in. I love you & i know how hard life it is for you. We're in the same boat, girl. Anyway, hope you had fun yesterday and i'm really really sorry that i did not wished you directly on your birthday because i don't know which number you're using now. Girl, happy belated birthday. My girl has turned a year older and she's olddddddddddddddddddddd :]

Labels: mixed...

I might not be the one but i won't be trying harder because even if i tried, i still won't be the one.

Let it be like how it is now.
I don't really bother much about it.
Neither do i care about it.
I am moving on, going on my own.
I don't care about all this shits.
And you.

Call me names or what, i don't really care.
But remember this.
I know myself the best.
Way better than you do.
Thanks for everything.
I appreciate it though.

I know i'm not up to your standard.
But never to expect HIGH on someone.
Cause if it come back to you, i don't think you can reached it.
No one would/will.
Cause there's this word.
no one is perfect.
I assume that you're leaving.
Even if you said, you don't.
Your behaviour shows.

If you're leaving, i'll be staying.
Cause if i were to leave too, i know we'll meet at one point, again.
If i stays, i will never get to meet you.
And i doubt, that is what you want from me right?
So, i'm granting your wishes.
And even if you're leaving me without goodbye.
I am still here whenever you need me.
and, i'm wishing you the best in life.

Don't worry, i'm sincere of letting you go.
What for to go after someone who is not willing.
I know i've got no high-self-esteem.
But this is me.
I am like this since i've fall for you.
No, maybe before i did.

Look.
I've always try my best to be myself.
But i just can't do it.
I am not myself whenever i'm somewhere near you.
If you really want to know....
Eversince you came into my life, i've turned a new leaf.
And i've learn new things in my life.
Patience.

One last word before i end this.
even if you're leaving me alone, i'm not going to give up and i'll still wait for even if it takes me 2049567584932 years.
you're the only one that can made me wait. you deserved it. i love you.

love,
linda.

I guess that the previous post was so tak perlu because i don't know why out of sudden, i am so drama-mama. So yeah, ignore the previous & act like as if i didn't post up anything okay? Heh. I am so tired today. I stay at home and i thought there's tuition today but unfortunately, my tutor could not make it so it will be conducted tomorrow at 11am. I don't think i can wake up that late because i still want to get plenty of rest. I am very tired. So, i think i should set my alarm clock at around 10am? Because i took nearly 1hr to get myself ready. Tomorrow, there's dance and i can't wait but fiza is not confirmed yet whether she's going or not. Sad or what? Anyway, farhana is at camp so she'll be back on Friday :]

Anugerah 2009 was fun! I like Ize Suliman & Nora cause i really thinks that they've got nice voice. I didn't vote for them cause it just wasting my bill. I might as well text someone rather than i vote right. berkire, i know. Sein Ahmad is back. I hope he could at least win this time. Ahhhh, i think he's getting much taller now. But still, the shortest. But short short, cute what! :] Hahaha. Okay whatever.

Eh, i wanna tell you that i just had nutella with bread and its heaven! Hahaha. I am craving for Vanilla Coke now :[

I'm not being proud or whatnot.

Who will care about you if it wasn't me?
Who will entertain you if it wasn't me?
Who will laugh at your jokes if it wasn't me?
Who will cheer you up if it wasn't me?

But, have i ever thought this?

Who will care about me if it wasn't you?
Who will entertain if it wasn't you?
Who will laugh together with me if it wasn't you?
Who will cheer me up if it wasn't you?
Who will made me smile if it wasn't you?

So that simply shows, life is hard without you, definitely.

I think baby pooh, winnie the pooh, stitch, elmo, cookie monster, sylvester, bugs bunny, strawberry shortcakes is cute. But cookie monster & elmo is definitely super cute & adorable. But baby Rif, the one at the barney and friends is also not bad anyway (: Okay, i swear this is so random :]

I still thinks cookie monster is cuter than elmo eventhough he look a bit uglier than elmo. (random)

I am so happy, very very happy cause i am very happy. Why i'm happy cause i am happy? I can't explain why because i am too happy. OMG. It's okay. And by the way, i really had fun just now. Me, Hawa BJ & Fiza really laugh a lot and i really enjoyed myself. I love you both so much :] But too bad, i have to go back home early :( I miss my girls. Can i maintain this way?

Kak mel, i felt bad for you. I hope you cheer up okay? Don't worry. He'll be in singapore. Don't suffer yourself. I love you okay. I'll be there whenever you need me, Insya-allah :)

I believe that everyone have a brain, so make sure you make full use of it. Why i'm saying this is because i am currently pissed off with my second brother and my mum. I know i shouldn't get pissed with them cause they are my family but i tell you what, they had offended me. Not once but twice or even more. I can't stand it. I'm not bringing down their names or makes all of you thinks negatively about them, No. I just want them to realised if i ever exist in their life. I know they don't feel that i'm exist. They don't even want to look at my face. So, i feel like i'm a stranger. I am part of family but now, i don't feel like i am. Frankly, i don't hate them. I just dislike them cause they treated me like as if i'm their dogs/dolls or whatever they thought i am.

I know i am the last to used the computer but that doesn't mean i'm the one who cause the computer to broke down. But then, the computer did not broke down right? Still can be switch on right? Thank god for that. And next, the internet cannot be used. And again, you blamed it on me. Is it fair? Oh, i'm the last to use the computer so i'm the one who caused it lar? Definitely, no. Fuck you for blaming for almost everything. I am useless, hopeless. I'm the one who does this and that and i'm the one who click on the virus. Everyone, blame it on me! Yes, me. What the fish, i'm soooo pissed off. You think i don't know how to use the computer? I can say that i'm way better in handling computer than you do. At least, i don't download such things at the computer except for songs. That's it. And, baikbaik computer aku suci, kau kasi kotor kan computer aku. paham2 lar eh. Sucker.

I know i've been coming back home recently but i tell you i have fun with my friends. I don't feel like my family appreciate me in their life. I don't feel they feel my presence except my sister. Eventhough she beats me up, scold me but there's a reason behind it. My mum called me when i'm at my uncle's house having a gathering and ask me why i'm not home yet? Hello, i'm at my own uncle's house for godness sake! And its near to our house.. Can't i at least got back home a little bit late? Somemore, i'm with my sister and brother and why you're so eager to ask me to go back home early when actually its only at 8. woa, dah pandai control nmpk? aku nie sape seh. aku tau ar aku ni out of control but nie family gathering seh, tkyah nk suroh balek cepat ar. aku tau bile and wat time nk alik tau. aku dah big enough to think seh. Have trust on me. You said i'm all grown up but still, you have not give me those trust yet. I am your daughter. I follow you everywhere you go. Wedding invitations, party and all. But yet, you still treat me like a stranger. Aku ni anjing. ikut mane2 dier gi. And at the same time, i feel like a tissue paper. Enough, enough. I need your trust and your support. You've not been giving me moral support for me to work even harder but infact, you've been saying hurtful words and harsh words on me which makes me not to study anymore. Haizzzzzz.

this is for someone. (hoping that he would read it although i know he didn't.)
maybe, you've already know the truth from someone but maybe you just don't feel like what i feel. but never to changed yourself and affect others badly. have some thoughts of other's feelings rather than to think of yourself. please, i'm begging you. be yourself whenever you're chatting, talking, see or whatever that connects to me. just because of this small issues, you've turned to someone whom i don't recorgnise at all. i am sad, so upsad to see the changes that you've made. but however, i am still going to move on. never to waste my time but i'm going to wait for you to changed. i am going to wait. it's okay if you've move on with the girl you love but i'll make sure your life won't be at ease. cheh, macam paham. frankly, i missed the old times we had.

i am sorry, i thought i can show you some hints but unfortunately, i was not given a chances to. maybe, this would be my last say and i'm leaving. i've been enduring this kind of shits for quite some times and the same old shits that i've got in return. who am i to you? i'm nothing. yes, nothing but just a piece of shits/rubbish. if you feel like throwing me off from your life, fine, its okay with me. i'll bare with the pain but please, don't show me the, " nak taknak layan attitude " cause, i seriously hate to you like that. you know i miss you? you know it has been so long we didn't talk and catch up with each other? don't you ever know that my feelings towards you had already fade and now it lef t a dot? awww. *cry badly*

i can see the differences and the changes that you've made. it's a big change, you see. i look through the past and the current one, i'm totally upset. and i know you can made me happy but however, i'm still not smiling right now. i don't know why. but today, is my worst day ever cause i hate almost everyone in my life. i feel like people is ignoring me but somehow, i did ignore someone. er, if you don't get me is okay. still, i want to try to be strong and cheer myself up but i don't know how. someone suggested me something but it works, somehow :]

and to passerby, who's the hell are you? i don't even know you and you tagged me rubbish. haish, get a life lar. even if i know you, i'm sorry, i like someone else lar k :] happy ar okay. go some other people's blog and tagged like that ar but please, not mine ar k.

I am happy, extremely and so does the others. I had parents meeting and I went there with my sister. Yes, my sister since my mom could not make it and she went on the behalf of my mom. Mr L talk with my sister and I kept on laughing and when my turn to answer the question, I just nodded and stuff. After that, we walked around pasar malam and seriously, both of my legs are fucking tired for no apperant reasons! Weird aye. I was like, urhhh, I am so tired that I almost could not make it for meeting but it's meeting and its a must, so I have to be strong and just move on. Today's meeting was fine, everyone let it out everything :] My hawa bj is sick, fever. And before she got even worst, she still have the time to be hyper though it was not even an hour but still, she made an effort to make everyone smile. Right?

I'm away for two weeks due to some reasons. And if I'm done with my two weeks, I'll come and join back the crew. Definitely, I am going to miss all of you. This week would be my last week, dancing, for time being. Takde linda, mesti tak best. Hahahaha! kidding onlyyyy :D

Can you imagine I had burger ramly for late night dinner? Aw, it has been so long I last had it.